Mom has dementia. The dr has increased the depression/sleep meds but it hasn’t helped at all. She has to walk to the other end of the house to get to my room. I have posted signs all over telling her where her bedroom is but she comes into my room instead and pulls on my foot or my hair. Sometimes she tries to push me out of bed. She has been waking me this way for over a month every night and it is so frightening I can’t get back to sleep. I can’t lock her in her room. She is getting up at night to use the bathroom which is right across the hall from her bedroom with signs and nightlights. I tried putting a toilet in her room but she wouldn’t use it. I’m actually afraid to sleep now. We can’t afford a nursing home. What should I do?
Consider that you are now spending your night in fear that you will be startled awake by “someone” in your room. And, that because of her issues, you will not be able to convince her not to wander at night. Locking doors will not work. She will most likely pound in the doors to be let in (or out). If she is on sleeping meds, there is unfortunately a good possibility she could trip and fall while walking through your house. And, if she manages to figure out how to escape your home, sne would wind up outside. If you have siblings share with them what you’ve told us. If not, ask her doctor for advice. Caregiving is difficult enough and to try to do it on no sleep is not good for your own health.
You say that you can’t afford a nursing home. I say that you can’t afford to go on without help.
Your profile is empty. Please tell us a bit more if you don’t mind. Is your mom eligible for Medicaid? Surely, she would qualify for needing assistance and could enter a facility if she was on Medicaid.
Do you catch up on your sleep during the day? Do you have help during the day? Have you ever contacted Council on Aging to get a little relief and guidance on your mom’s future care? Have you met with a social worker to plan for the future? Please be proactive in researching what is available to you.
Best wishes to you and your mom.
If you can't afford a nursing home, and if she has no income get her on Medicaid. It's unsafe for her to live with you from what you are describing. She could easily walk out the front door or turn on a stove or whatever.