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Hi, my dad fell again this morning in the bathroom and I called 911 to send both firefighters for a lift assist, but also an ambulance just in case a trip to the ER was needed. They sent him to the ER, with my request because I know that he is unsafe here in the house (it’s just us two here in the house and I’m 48 years old with cervical disc/back issues and receiving a military disability). He was admitted for a 24 hour routine observation AND tested positive for covid. I requested a social worker/case manager to be assigned to him and I plan on telling them all that has been happening the past couple of months…….fecal and urinary incontinence, unbalanced walking and inability to get up from couch/chair at times. Dad is 88 years by the way and I’ve had him for 4 years, things are getting worse and I’m afraid that he’s going to fall and really hurt himself. What exactly is the social worker/case manager at the hospital going to look for to start NH placement? Is there a list of daily activities that he can no longer do that they will want to know about? If so, I got a whole list. Just wondering what to expect from here on out. Thank you in advance.

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He needs to be evaluated for 24/7 care. See if he can be evaulated in the hospital. Explain everything you did here and that you are not physically able to care for him. If Dad has the money place him in an Assisted Living. If no money, start the Medicaid application.
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The most important question will be if dad has a sound mind. If so, he’s free to decide where he wants to live. If he’s living in your home and you do not want him back there, then make that clear, saying you do not feel he is safe there, and no accommodations to the home will make it so.
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Unfortunately they are going to look for discharge planning only when you ADAMANTLY and IRREVOCABLY tell them that your Dad cannot come to your home because you cannot care for him any more due to your own physical limitations. I would get a letter from your own MD to that effect and tell Social Worker to START NOW with discharge planning for placement. There may be a lot involved and there may be need to apply for help if there are no assets so Dad can had medicaid placement. I am so sorry. You cannot risk your own health now. Please don't accept any nonsense from Social Workers such as "We can get you help" and " We can help you make this work". They cannot and they will not. You need to refuse placement back into your home.
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The Covid may be blamed for his latest fall, so be prepared for this latest incident not being taken into account as an ongoing problem.
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If dad is competent and refuses placement he cannot be forced. You can google "activities of daily living" for that answer.
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Sounds like it's time for dad to live elsewhere. He probably won't want to and might be mad (like my mom) but you have to do what's best for both of you. Maybe he can go to "rehab" after he's over covid, straight from the hospital. That is the best way to get him placed - for him just to not come home. Tell them he needs to be able to X, Y and Z before you could even consider taking him back home and it appears that he will never be able to meet those goals.

This will be hard but you can do it!
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