Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
What struck me in the "How to handle a clingy senior" article was "...It’s best not to make a big deal out of temporary absences, as they can be upsetting for a dementia patient and those in the later stages will likely forget your absence before long. Just ensure that your loved one is safe and supervised when you are not present. Because dementia is different for every person and the symptoms usually fluctuate from day to day, you’ll probably have to work on addressing additional issues like emotional outbursts or incessant phone calls as they arise..."
user70, this behavior is called "shadowing". Knowing what's it's called will help you source information on how to work through it. In my search I found that it occurs from a place of fear, anxiety, insecurity of your LO, seeing you as the one thing they feel safe and certain about and can understand in their increasing jumbled world. Suggestions to deal with it is to maintain a routine. It was suggested to use an egg timer when needing a bathroom break: start the egg timer and hand it to your LO, tell them when it goes off you will be out of the bathroom. Also suggested that you start them on a "meaningful activity" while you're gone, like folding towels, sorting nuts and bolts, coloring, etc. When you come back out praise them for what they did. I'm sure there are other ideas. Hope this helps you.
Just looking at your profile you have been Caregiving for a while. There's a post from 2012 where you are burnt out.
How old are you and Mom. Is there Dementia involved? Is money a problem? If not there are nice ALs. If Mom needs 24/7 care maybe its time for a nice NH. You can't do this anymore.
Called my Dad to see how things were. After a few minutes can hear Mum's calling out where are you? 😔
I feel for you. I agree it's an anxiety thing.
I would put a video & timer/alarm to go off in 5mins. (Used to do that with my kids. I'm having some quiet time. In my room. Alone. If you interior - I'll start the timer again). Increase to 10, then 20 mins. Sadly, I doubt this would work if dementia... but may?? if anxiety/depression. Have a digital clock she can watch.
User 70, I know what you are talking about, my mom does the same thing. I can’t leave the room for a second before she needs something or has to use the bathroom. I’m not expected to need any rest at all. This doesn’t leave any time to take care of any of my own needs. She doesn’t do it to any of my siblings, they come and go as they please, which makes it necessary for me to set up plans in advance to have a day away about every 2-3 weeks. They act like I don’t have a life and never had a life of my own before this. It makes me angry at times, because they seem to think I don’t matter and my needs don’t matter. I hope things get better for you and all of us caregivers
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/elderly-parent-follows-around-the-house-141132.htm
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/how-to-handle-a-clingy-senior-163600.htm
How old are you and Mom. Is there Dementia involved? Is money a problem? If not there are nice ALs. If Mom needs 24/7 care maybe its time for a nice NH. You can't do this anymore.
I feel for you. I agree it's an anxiety thing.
I would put a video & timer/alarm to go off in 5mins. (Used to do that with my kids. I'm having some quiet time. In my room. Alone. If you interior - I'll start the timer again). Increase to 10, then 20 mins. Sadly, I doubt this would work if dementia... but may?? if anxiety/depression. Have a digital clock she can watch.
I'll be looking for suggestions too.
I know what you are talking about, my mom does the same thing. I can’t leave the room for a second before she needs something or has to use the bathroom. I’m not expected to need any rest at all. This doesn’t leave any time to take care of any of my own needs.
She doesn’t do it to any of my siblings, they come and go as they please, which makes it necessary for me to set up plans in advance to have a day away about every 2-3 weeks. They act like I don’t have a life and never had a life of my own before this. It makes me angry at times, because they seem to think I don’t matter and my needs don’t matter.
I hope things get better for you and all of us caregivers